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I give up :(

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alexmtl
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Post by Sbenson11 Tue Jan 26, 2016 9:53 am

I give up Sad

I frequent a local Facebook group about aquariums and it seems no matter how hard I try to help I am consistently shot down. It seems that every day there are people posting with fish in desperate situations. Unfortunately whatever I suggest seems to be the wrong problem/cure. The half baked know it all's that frequent this page seem to know more then me. I am just tired of defending myself and my suggestions.

So regrettably I will have to leave the local fish community to it's own devices.

Steve
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Post by Shell Tue Jan 26, 2016 2:23 pm

That really is too bad - if you leave the group, they will be missing out on valuable info from an experienced guy, for sure. 

Is it just a select few that shoot you down? I only ask because I was a member of a Guinea pig forum before and there were two people who continuously shot me down, most of the time with no logical reason to back it up, which can be frustrating - but, I stuck it out only because I knew others valued my experience...and I learned who to accept advice from as well. If the majority of this FB group shoots you down, and claims to know more than you, well, I can completely see why you would not want to frequent their page anymore. 

It can be so frustrating, because I am sure there are people on there who have learned from you....also frustrating because no one should be shot down; in situations where people have different perspectives, it should be worded just as that, with supported reasoning and a "community approach".

Sad to hear about your experience - again, really too bad  Mad Crying or Very sad
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Post by GaryE Tue Jan 26, 2016 5:14 pm

The tear you down reflex runs deep. I find that usually when you say something that is a tough truth, you either get pointedly ignored, or the person asks again hoping you will provide the answer they want.
Internet discussions take a thick skin. That 's good reason to appreciate this forum, where there is a lot of mutual respect on display.
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Post by alexmtl Tue Jan 26, 2016 6:08 pm

Hearing this really infuriates me ... and I am saddened to see such behaviour.

Sorry to hear Steve. It must hurt badly, as I know that you were involved to help people rather than for personal gain.

Internet forums, facebook or any digital social media is full of people who derive personal gain for many of the wrong reasons (trite). It is up to the moderators and site facilitators (if they have one) to provide the environment. It is human nature that without rules / accountability, vulnerable people inevitably (with issues) hide behind a mask of anonymity and abuse these freedoms. It is too bad that decorum does not self regulate as other members should be supporting and defending the altruistic and the benevolent. Trolls. Hurt and damaged goods. Really they need help, more than you could have provided.

A sad group, that unfortunately has lost a great asset, in you. It is their loss. Would you want to live in a town that was corrupt and unbridled without a sheriff?

Youtube and Facebook do not define the world. Steve you are appreciated and recognized for your expertize here and in other dimensions, I'm sure. It is comforting that beauty and virtue found in graceful souls are universally recognized as truths.
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Post by Sbenson11 Wed Jan 27, 2016 4:48 am

Thanks guys,

I certainly try and help where I can and I will be the first person to admit it if I know nothing about the issue. The regulars on their know who I am and what I bring to the table, however it's the new people with their first tank that concern me. These people regularly jump on with fish in full distress needing imitate action. Admittedly I know very little about tropical fish, however most issues are common with Goldfish/Koi. So when someone who's only experience in fish keeping is a Betta in a goldfish bowl tell's me I don't know what Ich is.

At any rate I still plan on keeping an eye on the page but don't think I will be posting anymore. I'm to old to argue with a 15 year old on the internet.

Steve
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Post by Fores41 Wed Jan 27, 2016 9:12 am

Sorry to hear Steve you have always amazed me with your knowledge and skills.
That group have lost a valuable asset and friend.
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Post by charlie1 Wed Jan 27, 2016 3:24 pm

Don`t feel bad, it`s the animal instinct coming out Very Happy , the resident experts feel threatend , & the territorial defense of their domain is on high alert.
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Post by GaryE Wed Jan 27, 2016 6:34 pm

Yeah, they sit at the laptop with their fins flared and yet all they produce are long strings of pale waste....
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Post by Fishypastor Thu Jan 28, 2016 1:45 am

Tell me where they live and Ill sneak some duckweed into their tanks... BWAHAHHAHAH....

Seriously though glad you are on here. Appreciate your perspective.
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Post by CAAIndie Sat Jan 30, 2016 12:42 pm

We are lucky to avoid both trolls and have a respectful group of members. Trolls really feed off the reactions they can get, and really relish causing disturbances. Not something we will ever tolerate here.

It's also a shame when people seek out opinions or advice online, but are only seeking to confirm their own beliefs.

Your experience and posts are always highly valued here Steve, and everyone will be treated with respect. You have my word on that! Smile
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